Q. How can your body affect your business?
A. In SO many ways.
Building confidence in your physical body is one of the real keys to unlocking your confidence in business - because we can only allow ourselves to show up in all our glory (as it were) in business, when we can allow ourselves to feel comfortable in our own skin. Not to mention the other emotional and brain-boosting benefits of letting go of all the guilt, shame & stress around how we look and what we eat!
For some, like me, making some long-overdue positive changes is the key to really unlocking that confidence.
For all of us - regardless of whether we want to stick where we are or make changes to feel healthier - moving towards acceptance and appreciation for what we have allows us to feel truly worthy, loved - and to show up with the confidence we need to live our most awesome, joyful lives. Listen here, or read more below.
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Last week I talked about the key areas you need to focus on in terms of mindset and personal development to help you achieve your financial goals and grow your business in a way that brings you joy and fulfillment as well. And today I wanted to zone in on one of those areas which has been almost a real surprise to me, but I now think it’s so important as part of your big picture - and that’s focusing on how you feel physically and creating healthy habits or aligned habits that support you feeling physically at your best. You might think this is completely separate from business and that it wouldn’t have anything to do with how successful your business could be - I definitely didn’t give it much thought at all at the start.
But it’s become really clear to me that this is something a lot of successful entrepreneurs start to master at the same time as mastering their habits for business growth, and not only that but that how you feel about yourself physically massively affects your ability to show up with that all-essential self-belief and confidence.
If you think about it, you’re projecting the way you feel about yourself into the world all the time - through your language & gestures, through the actions you take or don’t take.
And if you’re putting out this vibe of ‘I’m not comfortable with me, I don’t like myself very much’ then it’s going to be really hard for other people to feel confident and comfortable with you too. Now personally I struggled with feeling uncomfortable about myself for years - basically as long as I can remember - and that lack of confidence showed up in many areas of my life; from the way I ran my business to my relationships, to allowing myself to be walked all over financially and being afraid to speak up for myself when it mattered. And funny enough, to overeating and social drinking to not feel rude, or like the exception, and to give me something to do when I felt uncomfortable in social situations.
Then I worked with my hypnotherapist and learned to feel a lot better about a lot of those things - and eventually to realise how I was using food and drink to bury some of those uncomfortable feelings.
But I still had this story in my head that I was somebody who was just naturally on the larger side, loved my food - but couldn’t eat like other people could and get away with it, and wasn’t very good at exercise so would never be what you might call athletic. These were all stories I’d picked up or come to believe through my childhood and beyond - we’ve all been that last one to get picked for P.E. haven’t we! So I heard myself developing this narrative of “I’m always going to be this way, I love my food and so I might as well not bother fighting it, I’m just going to accept that I’m on the curvier side and forget trying to change that”. Now I am all for body acceptance and I absolutely don’t believe in being in a constant battle with your body - I believe it’s 100% ok, in fact absolutely healthy and normal to love food and we shouldn’t feel bad about that, and we shouldn’t feel like we have to change anything about ourselves to fit in or be acceptable to other people - if they have a problem with us, it’s their problem not ours! So I did a lot of work on respecting and appreciating my body as it was and developing the mindset that I am absolutely worthy of love and respect whatever shape, size or anything else I may be.
And I think that’s so important, because like we said, what you feel about yourself you project into the world and you subconsciously let others know how you feel about yourself through the way you show up.
But I also think we have to recognise when we’re allowing ourselves to opt out of looking after ourselves the way we would really want and opting out of feeling the way we want to feel, because it seems too hard or because it feels a bit scary or daunting to go there - just because you’ve never been a fit and healthy person, it doesn’t mean that’s impossible for you.
It just means you haven’t found out how to do it yet in a way that works for you - and that’s enough to put a lot of people off ever trying to feel their best.
Which I also think isn’t really true body positivity, because we’re not giving ourselves a fair chance to be at our best and healthiest. In business, we want to give ourselves a shot at being the best version of ourselves that we can be - why not for our physical selves, too? So I recognised that deep down, the way I was showing up for myself and my body in terms of the way I was treating myself wasn’t the most loving or appreciative it could be.
I was being positive about the body I had, but not really showing myself love in terms of looking after it very well.
And it honestly that concerned me because I’m not getting any younger, I have 2 little kids, both my parents have had heart issues and I know that I don’t want to suffer with anything that serious or, just on a day to day level - not be able to keep up with my family. I also know that being pretty sedentary and finding exercise harder and harder as time went on was not a one-way-street I wanted to get in to - being able to exercise and sleep well are both huge parts of mental wellbeing, so I knew that I wanted to become a generally healthier person to avoid the slippery slope into anxiety from NOT being able to move so well. I think, if you’re making any major changes in your life, they should always come from an expansive, exciting place where you’re almost exploring and taking an adventure into new territory for yourself.
I love challenging myself and seeing what’s possible - and I guess that’s the same for many of us in business! And so the decision to take control of my body and health again after 5 years of babies and motherhood and building a business around that felt absolutely that way - something I was doing for ME, rather than because I didn’t feel socially acceptable of because I thought anyone else would want me to change. I almost feel I have to justify this now because so many of the messages around body positivity have become almost critical of anyone who does want to make a positive change for themselves, and I think that’s a great shame - and shame is a great word here because nobody should ever feel shame about what they choose to do or not do with their own body.
As long as it’s a change for you, it’s all good with me! So I reached a place - like I have in business many times - where I’ve decided to stop making excuses, stop pretending I can’t change things and get out of my own way. I’ve just turned 42 and I’m probably fitter now than I’ve ever been. I’ve lost probably about 10 pounds this year - which isn’t massive but it’s a significant achievement because before, when I was ‘half-wanting-to-change’ rather than totally committed, I was just watching the scales creep up and up and wondering why that was happening even though I was eating pretty healthily. I’ve since learned a lot about nutrition, portion control and what my body is really trying to tell me about how hungry I am, and I’m not relying on willpower but on facts and factoring in the food I love!
I’m using my own knowledge of mindset along with eating in a way that works for me and my lifestyle, I am fully on board with it because it just feels good.
I actually feel better and far less bloated than I ever used to, but I’d become so used to that before that I hadn’t even noticed it was a thing.
And the really great thing is that this is building my confidence and self-belief in my business - not to mention my energy levels - even further. Because when you see how you can take down your own barriers and find ways to improve in one area of your life, it gives you this great realisation that - hang on, if I can do this then I can do anything!
Nothing is set in stone and there’s nothing we have to put up with about ourselves or our circumstances IF we want them to change. All we have to do is find a way that works for us. And of course, just paying attention to ourselves, our needs and making sure we’re really treating ourselves with love and respect is so powerful in terms of building our self-worth too. So I really do think that the better we allow ourselves to feel physically AND in terms of building our body confidence, the more we will start to see that increased self-worth bringing in more and more success elsewhere in our lives and businesses. So I’ve got another really interesting episode for you, if this is something you’re interested in! You can find it here:
Menopause, Mindset & Weight Management
My friend Greg Fearon is a personal trainer & nutrition coach and he talks with me about some of the ways we sabotage ourselves and our bodies, busts a few myths around weight control and the menopause and gives us his take on the difference looking after your physical wellbeing could make to your business - it’s packed full of great tips and some big surprises!
Here are the current ways to Work With Me
Join my FREE 21 day e-course Worthy, Wealthy & Wise - and learn MORE secrets of self-mastery, ease and abundance!
Listen & subscribe on Apple, Google podcasts, Spotify, YouTube - or search ‘Purpose, Peace & Profit’ on your favourite podcast platform!