"Hobby job", "Your little job", "When are you going to get a proper job?" - all phrases that can raise the hackles in the blink of an eye!
Here's how to deal with those negative perceptions so they don't affect YOU or your progress in your business.
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We ran a money mindset training session a couple of weeks ago in my membership The Aligned Mind and Business Academy. And one really interesting question that came up was how to deal with a partner’s negative money mindset.
Now, so often our ability to make progress in our business can be influenced and even stifled by those we love, or by what we think those we love will think. That’s certainly been the case for me at various points in my business.
Of course this runs much deeper than money mindset - it’s often about other people’s perceptions of our business as a whole! So I opened up the question to my free group Unblock Your Business. And there was an influx of responses - people’s parents, spouses, in-laws, well meaning friends and relatives - often in a well-meaning way, but essentially making light of people’s businesses or not taking them seriously. There were some pretty shocking stories, I can tell you!
So how do you deal with that and stop their negative perceptions affecting how YOU feel about your business, or yourself, and stopping you from showing up as fully as you’d like?
Wonderful things start to happen when we flip that around and say “I choose not to be affected by it.
How does that show up in my world… and what impact might that have on them?”.
We often fear going there and our tendency - generalising, but as women especially - is to people please and suppress what we believe is good for us or the right thing to do for fear of upsetting the apple cart.
And often we actually make enormous assumptions in doing that, and compromise much too much!
Really, the only way to shift someone else’s perspective is to stand our ground, stay true to our beliefs and show them with love that it’s ok, it’s safe to do things our way.
And if we do that then gradually their perspective will start to shift, too.
For the most part!
Sometimes it doesn’t - and that’s when we have to choose to protect ourselves, choose to feel worthy even if other people don’t believe it - and almost put up a shield where we just let their negative comments bounce off us.
Expectation has an enormous role to play in how people respond, as well, which is fascinating. When we expect certain behaviours of people they tend to play to them.
I’ve noticed this with my own kids and you may have noticed similar things too - when I’m expecting the worst of their behaviour, they pick up on that and they play to my expectations.
When I focus on all their good qualities instead and trust them to do a good job, usually things start to shift in the right direction.
So if we expect the worst of our partners we’ll tend to give off ‘anxiety vibes’ too and they will take on that anxiety and behave worse… whereas if we just calmly go about doing things our own way and we’re open and honest about that, very often it’s nowhere near as big of a deal as we imagine and they start to relax too.
This is all down to little cells in the brain called mirror neurons - which are basically there to encourage the whole tribe to feel and do similar things at the same time. And you can really turn it to your advantage, if you choose to!
So if you want others to have confidence in you, you have to have confidence in yourself first. If you want them to value you, you have to value yourself first. And if you want them to believe in you - you have to believe in yourself first.
That goes for family and friends right through to prospective clients on sales calls and even real life clients.
It’s powerful stuff!
Join my FREE 21 day e-course Worthy, Wealthy & Wise - and learn MORE secrets of self-mastery, ease and abundance!
Here are the current ways to Work With Me
Listen & subscribe on Apple, Google podcasts, Spotify, YouTube - or search ‘Align & Arise’ on your favourite podcast platform!