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I did a shocking thing 😱 (and it involved pastry)

Ok, it's not THAT shocking 😅 - apologies for the slightly clickbait-y title!  

But it IS something I want to make sure you know IS possible for you.

We're talking... conscious self-control. Radical Self-Leadership.

And it involves the most delicious pastries - possibly in the world!  

See, I'm a total sucker for an almond croissant 🥐.  

And about halfway between my front door and the school gates, there's a little deli - which invites you in with its beautiful rainbow array of fruit, veg and flowers... 

... then bashes you over the head and empties your wallet once you get to the till, by hypnotising the sense out of you with these incredible and pretty darned irresistible pastries.

It's not just the almond croissants... their cinnamon buns are out of this world. Pain aux raisins, pistachio swirls, blueberry muffins, stunning sourdough loaves... and last week they had this incredible apple danish thing which was just to die for. (I'm guessing.  Ahem).

Anyway, they've got the sales psychology thing NAILED.  

Put a very tempting thing there that gets your brain lit up like a Christmas tree of dopamine anticipation, create urgency (OMG I'm at the front of the queue!  I have to leave the shop in a moment!  Must decide!  I WANT ONE!!!) - then they distract your rational mind with a smile and a bit of conversation... and BOOM.

B*stards 🤣  (Honestly, they're SO lovely).

Let's just say they're sold out by mid-morning most days.

So, I've saw their game (ha!), and rather than just giving in to temptation willy nilly - I made a PLAN.

(Willy nilly - where the heck does that phrase come from, anyway?!)

I decided that pastry day would be Thursdays - the morning when I don't really have time for my normal routine because I have a regular call in my diary at 9.30am.  

It would be my day 'off' the usual exercise - just time to get my pastry, grab a coffee, check my emails and get settled in.

It worked beautifully, that plan!  

Because one sure-fire way to avoid any kind of irrational, spur-of-the-moment fear/dopamine-based decision making, is to decide in advance EXACTLY what you're going to do.  

If there's no tempting alternative for your brain to argue its way into, it's MUCH harder for it to derail you - and logic can prevail.  


(You're welcome).

So Thursdays were pastry days; every other day was about proper nutrition.

Only this week - something even better happened.

Actually, it's been happening a lot since I did my own energetic & mental wellbeing review, and decided to get properly back in my left prefrontal cortex (the bit of your brain that wears the rational power pants.  Hell yeah).

Yes - I walked right on by that deli.

(I know.  Neither can I.  So proud).

Now, let's be clear - plenty of people are VERY good at avoiding and restricting their food & consumables - and probably not in a very healthy way.

In fact controlling everything to the nth degree is another form of addiction - and often stems from fear, health anxiety and/or self-acceptance issues.

And whilst 'clean eating' is become pretty popular - ask any nutritionist and they'll tell you that it's absolutely fine and healthy for you to eat the foods you ENJOY as part of a healthy, balanced diet.

And that's the key.

Whatever you're doing, and however you're looking after yourself and your body - it needs to come from a place of ENJOYMENT, empowerment and alignment with the person you want to be.

Not a place of fear. 

Not a place of 'should'.

Not a place of 'It felt good while I was stuffing it in my face, then terrible for the rest of the day'.

Not a place of habit.

And that's what true self-care looks like.

It's Self-Leadership.

The ability to make those decisions that serve you - and your future - IN the moment - and not be influenced by anyone or anything that might try to convince you otherwise.

Far from being all about anxiety or control, it's about being able to ask yourself one simple question - and get an honest answer.

"Do I really want this?  Really?".

That's it.

That's exactly what I did this week, on the way back from school drop-off.  And the answer was 'Meh'.  So I strolled on by.  

Maybe next week it'll be different!  

But it'll be true to me.  

And that's what counts.

Now I have a question for you:

If you could consciously take control over any one aspect of your life - what would that be?

(Oh, and also - what's your favourite pastry?)

Send me an email at and let me know!

Abi x

P.S. below, you'll find my 7 Stages of Self-Care - if this is something you want to learn more about, hop in to my Living Journal mindset membership FREE for 14 days!

Wired for Wealth®️: The 7 Stages of Self-Care
Wired for Wealth®️: The 7 Stages of Self-Care


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